Roger Clemens may well be innocent of the charge that he lied about his taking illegal substances during his baseball career.
He may be telling the truth that it's a really big — Texas-sized, in fact — misunderstanding, and has been that all along. He may a modern Joan of Arc with a 96 mph fastball when this sad chapter is written in the history books.
And if you believe any of that nonsense, I'd like to interest you in buying a bridge in the great borough of Brooklyn, about three miles from where I am sitting and typing this blog post.
Clemens doesn’t get it, does he? He violated the three cardinal rules of celebrity life:
1. The cover-up is more offensive to journalists than the crime itself. (So what if Clemens actually took steroids — just say you're sorry you did and we can all move on.)
2. Never believe your press clippings. (Just because you could strike out David Ortiz or Albert Pujols three times in a game doesn't make you a well-rounded human being.)
3. Don't come across as arrogant or holier than thou. (Media people really, really hate athletes or entertainers or politicians who somehow believe that their moral compass is superior to yours or mine.)
Roger Clemens is in trouble. He's guilty in the court of public opinion, which is a big problem in itself. But now he faces the prospect of a protracted and highly public trial. It's bound to be messy and painful for his family, friends and fans. He should've known better.
Jon Friedman writes the Media Web column for MarketWatch.com. Click here to read his latest column.
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