Honesty the Best Policy in More Ways Than One
Research Reveals the Allure of Authenticity
Interpersonal attraction comes in many forms, from personal appearance to body language, attire to behavior.
It also includes chemistry formed through character and conversation.
Yet in today's world where anyone can "dress the part" or "talk the talk," we wonder how we somehow gravitate towards some people over others, even at first impression.
Research reveals some cues about the personal traits that cause us to be attracted to certain people over others:
Authenticity's Appeal
Leanne ten Brinke et al. (2025) studied the impact of truth-telling on attraction.
They began by noting the reality that despite the frequency of deception within interpersonal interaction, we rarely doubt the sincerity of others.
Yet indirect evaluations of honesty versus dishonesty may differ even without suspicion about veracity.
They demonstrated across three studies that target individuals were perceived as more attractive when they were telling the truth as opposed to when they were lying; a result they also found was mediated by the target individual's openness and warmth.
They found the "truth attraction effect" was stronger for female targets than male, but unaffected by the gender of the judge.
As a practical matter, ten Brinke et al. (ibid.) state that their findings suggest that we may be more likely to approach people who are honest, even when we are not actively judging their veracity.
Attraction, Approach, and Authenticity
Additionally, regarding the ebb and flow of conversation, ten Brinke et al. (supra) found that participants were less attracted to deceptive targets during critical questions (the "truth/lie moment") as compared to baseline questions where all targets were honest.
They also found that when targets told both truth and lies, they were perceived as more attractive when telling the truth than when lying about the same topic.
Regarding gender differences, they found that the truth attraction effect appeared to be stronger for female targets, and that impressions of openness and warmth may mediate these effects.
Regarding a possible explanation, they note that being unpleasant, uncooperative, and providing little detail are behavioral predictors of deception.
The Social Costs of Deception Versus Disclosure
Because at least to some extent, social life is impacted by attraction and attractiveness, ten Brinke et al. (supra) note that their findings indicate that people may be motivated to approach truth-tellers rather than liars indicative of the potential costs of deception in everyday life.
This observation could arguably impact the ways in which people seek to be more honest in their daily interactions, both personal and professional.
Considering the contemporary value of truth through transparency, many people already share much of their lives both on and offline, sometimes withholding private details to ensure the safety of self and family.
Yet as a best practice when sharing appropriately, both publicly and privately, from genuine compliments to describing background and work experience, honesty is apparently the best policy in more ways than one.
This article was originally published in Psychology Today, and is used with the permission of its author.
Wendy L. Patrick, JD, MDiv, Ph.D., is an award-winning career trial attorney and media commentator. She is host of "Live with Dr. Wendy" on KCBQ, and a daily guest on other media outlets, delivering a lively mix of flash, substance, and style. Read Dr. Wendy L. Patrick's Reports — More Here.
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