Ignoring, Burying Anxieties Never Works

Those thoughts just won’t stop coming. they might be about guilt, regret, or fear of something you did or experienced in the past.

They might be about worry and anxiety concerning what’s possibly coming your way in the future:

• What do you do?
• Alcohol or drugs?
• Depression and medication?
• Freezing in place, not being able to enjoy your life or even function adequately at all?
• Are those the only options?

No.

But it is where most people go.

Are there ways to get rid of these distracting thoughts?

Yes.

And you will need to, in order to focus on your joys and obligations in your immediate life. Having your mind wander during the day under the best of conditions is totally normal!

Our attention spans are shorter than we think . . . our minds flutter around like a butterfly landing on diff erent memories or worries.

So, to a certain degree, our minds will wander into areas that upset us.

What do you do at that moment?

Squeeze your eyes and try not to think about those distressing thoughts?

Yeah, no; doesn’t work.

That just makes you think about them even harder, which means that ignoring or burying notions won’t work.

Here's an idea: Make an appointment to think about that thought at a specific time/place.

This way you are not fighting those thoughts as they fight back even harder for existence.

Announce to those thoughts — and I particularly like when you say it out loud — "OK, got it, I have to think about this and confront it. I will do it this afternoon at 4 p.m."

Sound nuts?

Probably.

But try it.

Make a deal with that intrusive thought to pay attention to it later, and be precise

When you do this, just see how much calmer you are at that very moment.

Now is the time to honor that appointment and think specifically about whether or not you can take any action about it.

For example, you have some upcoming challenge.

First question is to think firmly about what you might do to better prepare for it.

That might include practice, getting more informed, or considering options.

Considering options might mean a Plan B.

If, frankly, there is nothing you can do about scary, anxious, awful feelings, you need to accept that might be true for now.

And, take the time to stand back in your mind and look at the situation that is causing you so much emotional stress as though you were watching a theatrical play.

Watch while breathing slowly and comfortably.

Watch as a nonjudgmental observer; don’t critique and don’t fight it.

Just observe while bringing your body and mind to a level of peace.

Bring yourself a sense of calm. This decreases anxiety and increases objectivity separate from rampant emotional moments.

In conclusion, don’t fight intrusive thoughts — welcome them in, and approach them with calm. We may not be able to fix everything that has happened or might happen, yet we can forge ahead with equanimity.

Dr. Laura (Laura Schlessinger) is a well-known radio personality and best-selling author. She appears regularly on many television shows and in many publications. Listen to Dr. Laura on SiriusXM Channel 111, Mon.–Sat. 2–6pm ET, Sun. 5–9pm ET.​ Read Dr. Laura's Reports — More Here.

Newsmax September