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Friday Sep 10 2010

The Tonight Show Starring with Leno

The preacher in Florida who wanted to burn the Koran has called it off. Instead, he’s just going to rip up a couple copies of “The Watchtower.”

In Iran, a woman can be stoned for committing adultery. In the United States, women commit adultery while stoned.

The Chinese government is apparently changing their “one child per family” rule. Now you can have a second kid to work the night shift.

According to a survey, the three most stressful cities to live in are Detroit, Los Angeles, and Cleveland. The reasons: the Lions, the Dodgers, and the Browns.



The Tonight Show Starring with Letterman

Rerun



The Tonight Show Starring with Ferguson

Grandparents Day is the day we take to appreciate the old folks. Or as CBS calls it, “Sweeps.”

Grandparents complain that their families don’t call them. But in their defense, a lot of the time that people call, grandparents answer the blender.

It would be easy to dismiss Grandparents Day as a fake holiday, but it would be wrong. Grandparents are America’s most precious natural resource.

I love the elderly, especially when they kick-box on Youtube.



The Tonight Show Starring with Kimmel

A research company used avatars of men dancing to determine which dance attracts the most women. They’re saying this research could finally lead to a cure for virginity.

Lindsay Lohan is in talks to make her first post-jail/rehab appearance on “Oprah.” I just hope Oprah doesn’t give her a car.

On his way to Asia, Gov. Schwarzenegger posted a picture of himself saying that he was flying over Alaska but couldn’t see Russia anywhere. Not only is Schwarzenegger a fellow Republican, but Sarah Palin had a “Conan the Barbarian” poster on the wall of her igloo.



The Tonight Show Starring with Jimmy Fallon

It was reported that president Obama wasn’t wearing his wedding ring at a press conference. I guess that makes the press conference the second-most difficult speech he’ll give this week.

A Playboy centerfold was tackled yesterday when she tried to open the emergency door on an airplane flight. She must have put up quite a fight because it took all 156 men on board to subdue her.

A new study found that Facebook users tend to be more narcissistic than others. When Facebook users heard that, they said “Are you guys talking about me?”


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