Welcome to New York City, the city that never sleeps. You know why? Bed bugs.
The weather here has been 70 and gray — like Brett Favre.
At training camp, Brett Favre fumbled his teeth, passed a kidney stone, and was tackled by his medical alert bracelet.
There’s already a movie in the works about the egg recall. It’s called “Eat, Pray, Vomit.”
Top Ten Ways Miss Universe Plans To Make The World A Better Place
Inspire peace and unity by looking hot
During this bedbug crisis, go door to door scratching the itchy
Bring your car to my house and I’ll change the oil
I’ll find a new wack-job to take over as “American Idol” judge
I’ll offer Osama bin Laden a meet-and-greet. When he shows up, bam! We grab him
Teach men to pull over and ask for directions. Am I right, ladies?
Give the world what it really needs: a new celebrity perfume
Bring peace and stability to Jennifer Aniston’s love life
Go around the globe kicking butt like “The Expendables”
Support equal rights for less attractive people, like Dave