This has been quite a week —100-degree temperatures, earthquakes, oil spills, and yet, we’re still having a better week than Mel Gibson.
Lindsay Lohan’s assistant was offered five figures to do a tell-all interview about her boss, but she declined because it could hurt her career. So Lindsay Lohan’s assistant has more sense than Gen. McChrystal.
Joe Biden is different from Dick Cheney. In the Bush years, the president would say things and the vice president would have a heart attack. Now, the vice president says something and Obama has a heart attack.
British Petroleum said that, in a perfect world, they could stop the Gulf oil leak within a month. In a perfect world, we wouldn’t have British Petroleum.