Billy Porter Reveals He Is HIV-Positive

Actor Billy Porter has gone public about living with HIV. 

The "Pose" star was diagnosed 14 years ago, but kept the news a secret in fear of discrimination. Now he is ready to tell his story.

"There’s a whole generation that was here, and I stand on their shoulders," he wrote in an article for The Hollywood Reporter. "I can be who I am in this space, at this time, because of the legacy that they left for me. So it’s time to put my big boy pants on and talk."

In the piece, Porter explained that the diagnosis came at the worst time of his life. He had already been diagnosed with Type 2 diabetes, he had signed bankruptcy papers, and then he was told that he was HIV-positive.

"The shame of that time, compounded with the shame that had already [accumulated] in my life, silenced me, and I have lived with that shame in silence for 14 years," the openly gay actor explained. "HIV-positive, where I come from, growing up in the Pentecostal church with a very religious family, is God’s punishment."

Porter said he told everyone who needed to know, but did not want his diagnosis to be made public as it would "just be another way for people to discriminate against me in an already discriminatory profession." 

So he tried to block it out. Push it to the back of his mind. Then the pandemic hit, and Porter was given the space to stop and reflect. He started to attend therapy and "started peeling back all these layers” while revisiting the trauma of being sexually abused by his stepfather as a child.

Porter said he also found the ability to work through his past and find forgiveness through his work and the characters he played. Landing the role of an HIV-positive character in "Pose" was a blessing as it gave him the opportunity "to work through the shame [of HIV] and where I have gotten to in this moment." Porter was able to "say everything that I wanted to say through a surrogate."

Now it is time to share his story with the world.

"That’s what I’m here for. I’m the vessel, and emotionally that was sufficient — until it wasn’t," he said. "Until I got married [in 2017]. Now I’m trying to have a family; now it’s not just me. It’s time to grow up and move on because shame is destructive — and if not dealt with, it can destroy everything in its path."

The star added that by coming out with the news, he hoped that it would free him to experience "real, unadulterated joy" and bring him peace. 

"This is for me. I’m doing this for me. I have too much s**t to do, and I don’t have any fear about it anymore, he said, adding, "I don’t care what anyone has to say. You’re either with me or simply move out of the way."

In 2019, Porter made history when he became the first openly gay black man to win an Emmy for lead actor in a drama series. He was honored for his work in "Pose." In his acceptance speech, Porter spoke of society's need for acceptance.

"We are the people," he said, according to CNN. "We, as artists, are the people that get to change the molecular structure of the hearts and minds of the people who live on this planet. Please don't ever stop doing that. Please don't ever stop telling the truth."

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