Tags: Flori-'duh': | America's | Rules-Free | Zone

Flori-'duh': America's Rules-Free Zone

Monday, 27 November 2000 12:00 AM

And they were right. There are none. Miami's rules-free zone has spread like an infection, as we have seen in the last three weeks, from Miami-Dade County to Broward and Palm Beach counties immediately to the north. Seen from outer space, the Sunshine Peninsula appears to be giving the cosmos the fabled middle finger. Geography thus confirms sociopathy.

For eight years, Arkansas was the butt of jokes; for a decade and beyond it will be Florida. Heap on the ridicule, America, because we deserve it. Before you do, let me put at your disposal what has come out of this southern dispose-all, in no particular order of shame:

1. Miami prosecutor Janet Reno, the author of Waco. Attorney General Reno's rape of Lady Justice converted her Department into Clinton's criminal defense firm.

2. Florida Congressman Alcee Hastings, the only federal judge impeached and convicted, for bribery, by a Congress controlled by his own Democrat Party. Mr. Hastings now hectors America on cable shows about his own and his party's superior morality, as do other South Florida Dem congressmen such as Peter Wexler and Peter Deutsch.

3. Miami's pro-rape rap group, 2 Live Crew, who 10 years ago took their obscene act all the way to the U.S. Supreme Court. This coming Friday an electoral obscenity from Florida is before the same high court. How fitting that these two Supreme Court cases serve as bookends for the Florida Decade.

4. University of Miami's Hurricane football team, the 1990s "College Football Team of the Decade" who, under the blind eye of Coach Jimmy Johnson, perfected trash-talking and denigration of one's opponents, thereby making Miami the college every decent sports fan in America loves to hate.

5. A South Florida shock radio station, whose broadcast signal pollutes most of the state, which is the only broadcast entity in America fined by Clinton's Federal Communications Commission for indecency. Now that took some doing.

Space restraints prevent me from providing a full list. But you get the idea.

There is a silver lining in all this for the rest of America. Of all the places in the world that could serve as the dumpster for the human refuse known as "O.J. Simpson," Florida now serves that purpose. O.J. lives about five miles from me, a mere knife's throw away.

If past performance is a guide, America might have another O.J. Simpson murder trial in the future, this one from Flori-duh! Let's hope the jury votes by paper ballot.

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And they were right. There are none. Miami's rules-free zone has spread like an infection, as we have seen in the last three weeks, from Miami-Dade County toBrowardand Palm Beach counties immediately to the north. Seen from outer space, the Sunshine Peninsula...
Flori-'duh':,America's,Rules-Free,Zone
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2000-00-27
Monday, 27 November 2000 12:00 AM
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