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And the Loser Was ...

Monday, 18 October 2004 12:00 AM

Many more decades later, political historians referred, appropriately, to that period as the Lost Election.

As it turned out, more than just an election had been lost. Both parties lost their very existence. The whole nation lost a great gap in its history. And, oh by the way, democracy disappeared in the process.

Not that by then anyone seemed to give a particular damn.

Even in 2004, national elections were beginning to dotter off the stage. Too expensive. Too much trouble. People actually had to get up off their duffs and make their way to polling places, there to stand in line and go through all that inconvenience. Not worth it.

Besides, virtuality was becoming the reality of the day. Public-opinion polls had already come to replace voting booths, just as buggy whips had in earlier years been rendered obsolete.

What was the point, after all, in going to all that pain in the butt of nationwide presidential elections when a few overnight telephone calls told you “what Americans are thinking”?

And that ridiculous “electoral college” or whatever it was called – just a dim-bulb notion of a bunch of dead white men with false teeth who would have looked so out of it on television.

So who cared if what’s his name – you know, Jesse Something-or-Other – was running around filing all those law suits trying to get the presidential election declared illegal or a bunch of non-votes counted as votes? As if it actually mattered who got elected president.

Not a surprise that nobody got excited when the 2004 election results got hung up in the courts for a decade or more. In no time the television news had discovered a fresh flurry of sex scandals and murders that were a lot more intriguing.

Enthralled by all the virtual reality in their pointless lives, people didn’t seem to miss having anyone occupying the White House. All it was anyway was a place for tourists in shorts, tennis shoes and baseball caps to wander through and gawk.

Nor did Americans seem to mind it when Europeans began to refer to the United States as the newest Third World country, not ready yet for self-government.

Fewer and fewer Americans insisted that government confine itself to enabling good things to happen by getting out of the way. Economic and social interests demanding victimhood entitlements from government poured millions into television “documentaries” instructing Americans on how and what to think, if at all.

American government – local, state and federal – came to be disrespected, disdained, then ignored. Substantial laws were no longer enacted, since who was heeding them anymore? Taxation was symbolic of the past, to be scoffed at and then evaded altogether.

The country fell apart at the seams. Jobs disappeared as private employers went out of business for lack of customers. The government dole was tried for a while, then abandoned when there were no incomes, no produced wealth to tax.

The United Nations was pressed into service. America was declared by an international court to be a slum of the global village, and thus a U.N. protectorate.

It became no longer necessary to guard America’s borders; no one wanted in anymore. Indeed, there was a mass exodus from the United States to better lands, like Somalia and Uruguay. Old Europe would allow no American immigrants.

“They’re too dumb to vote,” the French premier was overheard to say way back then. “More interested in having someone litigate the outcome of their elections for them. Let them eat cake.”

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Many more decades later, political historians referred, appropriately, to that period as the Lost Election. As it turned out, more than just an election had been lost. Both parties lost their very existence. The whole nation lost a great gap in its history. And, oh by...
And,the,Loser,Was,...
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2004-00-18
Monday, 18 October 2004 12:00 AM
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