Tags: couples | sex | letdown | fear | inadequate

Couples Have Less Sex Fearing It Will Be Letdown: Survey

By    |   Thursday, 06 Aug 2015 02:12 PM


Couples may be having less sex these days, and one of the reasons is that an emphasis on sex in books such as Fifty Shades of Grey have left couples with such a strong fear of inadequacy that they avoid sex completely rather than risk disappointment, say British experts.

A poll by YouGov found that 51 percent of British adults hadn't had sex in the past month. Only 45 percent said they were "fairly satisfied" or "very satisfied" with their sex lives.

Relate, a British relationship charity, said that many men and women ignore the good aspects of their sex lives. While couples often say they want their sex lives to be more spontaneous, that's rarely the case, say Relate's counselors. Busy couples have to schedule intimacy, just like they plan for other activities.

"It's sad that so few people are sexually satisfied and put pressure on themselves to perform," Cate Campbell, a psychosexual therapist and Relate Institute lecturer, told the Daily Mail.
"Noticing what is going well, rather than dwelling on problems, is quite difficult when we're all bombarded with messages about how sex 'ought' to be.

"Sex definitely doesn’t have to be disappointing — there's plenty that can turn your situation around so you can enjoy a sustained, fulfilling sex life. What constitutes a satisfying sex life can vary wildly from one person to the next, so working out what makes you tick is a great starting point."

The first step in regaining a satisfying sex life is to talk about sex with their partner. "This can have an impact on our relationships and the way we feel about ourselves," Relate sex therapist Denise Knowles told the Daily Mail.

"The first step in improving sex for most people is to start talking honestly about what you want from your sex life, and, crucially, listening to your partner's wishes as well."



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Couples may be having less sex these days, and one of the reasons is that an emphasis on sex in books such as Fifty Shades of Grey have left couples with such a strong fear of inadequacy that they avoid sex completely rather than risk disappointment, say British experts. A...
couples, sex, letdown, fear, inadequate
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2015-12-06
Thursday, 06 Aug 2015 02:12 PM
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