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Wednesday Sep 02 2015

The Tonight Show Starring with Jimmy Fallon

In an interview with CNN, former Vice President Dick Cheney said that he has no plans to endorse Donald Trump. When asked if he'd have a change of heart, Cheney was like, "Yes, every week."

Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker says that he thinks only 12 states will decide the presidential election. And if Trump wins, those 12 states will include shock, confusion, outrage, despair, denial, anger, bargaining and finally acceptance.

President Obama is taking over the White House's official Instagram account this week to post pictures of his trip to Alaska. Or to put it another way, President Obama is now your annoying friend on vacation.

While he was in Alaska, President Obama stopped at a cafe and bought out all of their cinnamon rolls for his staff. The staff was like, "Thanks, Obama." And the guy behind him in line was like, "Yeah, thanks Obama."

Yesterday, UFC fighter Ronda Rousey accepted a Marine's invitation to the Marine Corps ball in December. When they heard Ronda Rousey was teaming up with the Marines, ISIS was like, "We surrender!"


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