The Best of Late Nite Jokes Edited by Newsmax.com

The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien

President Obama, Michelle Obama, and Oprah Winfrey are all in Denmark lobbying for the 2016 Olympics to be in Chicago. Apparently this is the most black people in Denmark since the 1987 Earth, Wind, and Fire tour.

The big show business rumor right now is that telecommunications giant Comcast is working out a deal that would leave them owning 51 percent of NBC. Still no word on what’s in it for Comcast.

Archaeologists in Ethiopia have discovered a 4.4-million-year-old skeleton believed to be the earliest known human ancestor and they’re calling her “Ardi.” However, Larry King is insisting her name was “Jan.”

Starting today, gay couples can register as legal partners in the state of Nevada. So congratulations to the cast of Cirque de Soleil!

Late Show Top Ten

Top Ten Things Overheard at China's Anniversary Celebration

10. So communism is 20 years younger than Cher?
9. The Beijing Red Roof Inn is the best we could do?
8. Let's take attendance to make sure all 1.3 billion people are here.
7. Wow, Regis will attend anything.
6. Why do I always get stuck sitting behind Yao Ming at these things?
5. Great! Letterman videotaped a special Top Ten list for us.
4. Is it me or is the Tiananmen Square cake a little tacky?
3. And now, President Hu Jintao will be roasted by the one and only Gilbert Gottfried.
2. Any more of those 'pandas in a blanket' appetizers?
1. Make sure we're home in time for Leno.

Late Show with David Letterman

Not available.

Late Night with Jimmy Fallon

President Obama is on the road. His first stop was Geneva where he held talks with Iranian diplomats about Iran’s nuclear weapons program. Or as Iran’s saying, “What nuclear weapons program?””

Sarah Palin’s new autobiography – that doesn’t come out until November — is already #1 on Amazon. And if you go to the Web site, it says, “People who bought this book also bought . . . no other books in their entire lives.”

I thought this was nice: Out of good sportsmanship, the foreword to Sarah's book was written by a moose.

Over in Bangladesh a man won a color television for killing more than 83,000 rats in nine months. Yeah, their “Deal or No Deal” is way different than ours.