Late Night Jokes Delivered to your Mailbox Daily!
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The Tonight Show with Jay Leno
This week is Explore Your Career Options week. Especially if you work for the Hillary Clinton campaign.
Hillary’s senior campaign adviser, Mark Penn, has left the campaign. Apparently he was coming under some heavy sniper fire.
Penn was credited for catapulting her from a veritable shoo-in to second place.
Former presidential candidate John Edwards announced he will not — will not — accept the nomination for vice president. Which is really important, considering no one has asked him.
Late Show with David Letterman
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Late Night with Conan O'Brien
Yesterday Hillary Clinton’s top adviser left her campaign. When he heard about it, Bill Clinton said, “Wait — we can leave?”
On Saturday, Barack Obama held several rallies in Montana. Officials say Barack attracted large crowds and doubled the black population of Montana.
John McCain is the only presidential candidate not using Secret Service protection. So far, the only protection he is using is the life insurance he bought from Wilfred Brimley.
According to a new poll, 81 percent of Americans think the country is on the wrong track. The other 19 percent own gas stations.
The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson
Hillary Clinton’s top strategist has quit her campaign team. Bill was shocked. He was like, “I didn’t know we could quit. Hell, I’m outta here.”
The next stop for the Olympic Torch is San Francisco. Police there expect huge protests. It'll be the first time San Francisco’s ever protested against anything flaming.
When something is flaming in San Francisco, they throw a parade.
The Olympic torch is an ancient tradition. It symbolizes fire stolen from the Greek God Zeus by Prometheus. Prometheus stole the fire from Zeus, and he gave it to an old man named John McCain.
Jimmy Kimmel Live!
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