Headlines (Scroll down for complete stories):
1. Michael Moore: Democrats Could Blow It
2. Obama's Daughters Not Paris or Britney Fans
3. Lindsay Lohan's Leap of Faith
4. 'American Carol' Attacks Unleashed
5. Hollywood Raises Bucks for Obama
1. Michael Moore: Democrats Could Blow It
Michael Moore usually can't stay quiet during a political campaign season. And this year is no exception.
In an attempt to insert himself into the current presidential contest, Moore has released a book called "Mike's Election Guide 2008."
In an excerpt on his Web site, the "Sicko" filmmaker posts a formula for a Barack Obama loss.
Titled "How The Democrats Can Blow It . . . In Six Easy Steps," Moore sets forth a "blueprint for losing the most winnable presidential election in American history."
Along with items that he claims will cause the presumptive Democrat nominee to eventually lose (like "saying nice things about McCain," picking "a running mate who is a conservative white guy or a general or a Republican" and "writing speeches for Obama that make him sound like a hawk") is something that signals a new level of self-absorption even for Moore. Step number six reads, "Denounce me!"
According to Moore, if Obama distances himself from him, it would be a fatal error, politically and strategically.
The "Bowling for Columbine" and "Fahrenheit 9/11" documentary maker writes that "Obama, at some point, might be asked this question: 'Michael Moore has endorsed you. But he recently said (fill in the blank with some outrageously offensive line taken out of context). Will you still accept his endorsement, or do you denounce him?'"
Moore answers his own hypothetical in the following way: "So Barack, by denouncing me, you can help McCain get elected. Because when you denounce me, it's not really me you're distancing yourself from — it's the millions upon millions of people who feel the same way about things as I do."
The only problem for Moore is that the millions upon millions of people who feel the same way he does live on Planet X and usually vote the tin foil hat party.
2. Obama's Daughters Not Paris or Britney Fans
Barack Obama is apparently upset about the ads put out by the John McCain campaign that use images of celebutant Hilton and pop star Spears.
In an interview with Marie Clare magazine, the Illinois senator says of his pre-teen daughters, "Malia [age 10] and Sasha [age 7] are very down on Britney Spears and Paris Hilton."
Obama explains, "Malia is the first one to change [the channel] if something suddenly comes on that she thinks is inappropriate," and that his older daughter would likely wield the remote if Spears or Hilton appear onscreen.
Daddy Barack would probably appreciate a channel switch whenever a McCain ad pops up — with or without celebs in it.
3. Lindsay Lohan's Leap of Faith
It could be that the Liz Taylor comparisons are affecting Lindsay Lohan in ways that are more than just fashion related.
According to sources, Lohan has decided to convert to Judaism.
Back in 1959, a 27-year-old Taylor changed her religious affiliation from Christian Science to Judaism following the passing of her third husband, Michael Todd, who tragically died in a plane crash.
Lohan has indicated that the motivation for her religious conversion has to do with her relationship with her companion, Samantha Ronson, who is of the Jewish faith.
Lindsay was raised a Roman Catholic, and her father, Michael Lohan, classifies himself as a born-again Christian.
"She's exploring right now," Michael told E! "She's explored the Church of Scientology, she tried Kabbalah, and now this. I think it's just another phase. But either way, she's involving God in her life, and I'm happy about that."
4. 'American Carol' Attacks Unleashed
One blogger refers to David Zucker's latest film, "An American Carol," as a "Zucker Movie Suicide Mission."
Another blogger asks the question: "What Happened to David Zucker?"
Weird postings have been appearing on the Internet, insulting the maker of "Airplane" and "Naked Gun" with ridiculous insinuations like "he's lost any comedic talent he once had," that he was going to "destroy his cred" and that he and others, namely Dennis Miller, had become "aggressively unfunny."
Why all the anger?
Well, maybe because Zucker is a former liberal who overhauled his political beliefs due, in part, to Hollywood's reaction to 9/11. He eventually looked to his left and saw a vast reservoir of comic material.
The filmmaker's latest flick is a takeoff on Charles Dickens' "A Christmas Carol." And the neo-Ebenezer Scrooge character of Michael Mallone just happens to bear a strong resemblance to Michael Moore.
In the movie, Mallone is visited by three spirits, those of John F. Kennedy, Gen. George Patton and George Washington, who try and teach him about the real meaning of American freedom.
Featured in the film is a group of like-minded actors, a sterling cast that includes Jon Voight, Kelsey Grammer, James Woods, Dennis Hopper, Robert Davi, and country singer Trace Adkins.
The late Chris Farley's younger brother Kevin plays Mallone and is decked out as Moore's doppelganger.
Zucker actually anticipated that he would be attacked for going against the Hollywood grain.
In an interview, which will appear in an upcoming Newsmax magazine, the filmmaker says that his approach wasn't altered. In fact, the only thing that had changed was the subject matter, which in the case of "An American Carol" happens to be the lampooning of the far left, a unique concept in today's Tinseltown.
"All I'm doing, and all I've done for the last 30 years, is find things that are taken too seriously and expose them in a comedic fashion," Zucker says. "Far left politics are taken too seriously.
"Who would've thought airplane disaster movies would be material for jokes before 'Airplane?' Or serious Westerns would be funny until 'Blazing Saddles'?" Zucker rhetorically asks. "My motivations have always been to first ask, 'Where can I find good jokes?'"
He's optimistic that people from all points of the political spectrum will enjoy "An American Carol." "Even though we are dealing with some serious subjects, we repeatedly remind the audience, 'You are watching a comedy,'" he says.
The lefties can scowl all they want; this moive is hilarious.
5. Hollywood Raises Bucks for Obama
Just in case the Barack Obama cash convoy slows down a bit, Hollywood celebs are lining up in droves to appear at fundraising events for their presidential candidate fave,
According to The New York Times, scheduled events include the following:
- "Gray's Anatomy"'s Ellen Pompeo attended a Seattle event and brought in the campaign bread for Barack.
- To fund Mr. Obama's trip to Washington, "West Wing" creator Aaron Sorkin and "Lethal Weapon" director Richard Donner are set to appear in Beverly Hills for a screening of the classic "Mr. Smith Goes to Washington."
- Obama's famed text messaging friend, Scarlett Johansson, is set to appear in Phoenix to bring in the Arizona desert dollars.
- To snag some left coast currency, an invitation only "Black & White Gala" is scheduled to take place in Los Angeles. The event's honorary board includes Don Cheadle, Jessica Alba, Lucy Liu, and Ashley Judd.
- A Geneva, Switzerland shindig is planned, and to gather in the green, the offshore event will feature George Clooney.
- For $250, or $10,000 for VIP tickets, folks can join Sarah Jessica Parker and Ann Wintour at a New York fashion fundraiser called "Runway to Change" to raise a bunch of pocket change for Barack.
It looks like going for the gold has taken on a whole new Hollywood meaning.
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