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Tuesday Oct 16 2012

Conan

The second presidential debate is on tonight. President Obama is now saying he was too polite to Mitt Romney in the first debate. Obama now plans to address Romney as "Money Bag."

One of President Obama's goals tonight is to win back female voters. Which explains why Obama is going to answer every question with a passage from "Fifty Shades of Grey."

After Paul Ryan stopped by for a photo op at a soup kitchen, the head of the charity said Ryan did nothing. In other words, that man is ready to be vice president.

Ross Perot has endorsed Mitt Romney. This could help Romney get the vote of people you forgot were still alive.

A company just came out with a car that will retail for only $3,000. They are calling it the 1997 Corolla.

The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson

It's not such a great day for Hulk Hogan. Sources now say he was involved in leaking his own sex tape. Faking the theft of a sex tape? This could give professional wrestling a bad name.

Everybody is talking about the presidential debate. The second debate was on earlier tonight. I liked the part when Mitt Romney said "Boooo, China." And Obama was like, "Yay, old people."

Nobody in the debate talked about today's big story out of Europe — the big art heist at a museum in Rotterdam. You have to hand it to these thieves. It is not easy sneaking up in the Netherlands. Usually your wooden shoes give you away.

Jimmy Kimmel Live

Tonight is the second of three big debates between President Obama and Mitt Romney from Hofstra University in Hempstead, New York, moderated by Candy Crowley. Why should it be on all channels? The Super Bowl is on one channel and we find it.

I don't know why they had a debate. This race was over last night when Honey Boo Boo made her official endorsement. She's pulling for Barack Obama. They say as goes Honey Boo Boo, so goes the election.

They agreed the subjects for the debate were foreign and domestic issues. Which pretty much covers everything, doesn't it? Where else is there besides foreign and domestic issues? Space, I guess?

Tonight's debate was what they call the town hall format, which is where real voters get to ask questions and the candidates ignore them and just talk about what they wanted to in the first place.

One of the rules was that the moderator will not ask follow-up questions or comment on either the questions asked by the audience or the answers by the candidates. So basically one of tonight's debate rules was that no one was allowed to debate.

 
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