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Thursday Sep 15 2011

The Tonight Show with Jay Leno Banner

I had a horrible nightmare. My cat was sick and the only vet in town was Ron Paul, and I didn’t have my pet insurance card.

President Obama is more popular overseas than here. Then again, he’s created more jobs over there than here.

Congress is investigating why the Obama administration invested over $500 million in a solar panel company called Solyndra, which filed for bankruptcy. Only the White House could pick a solar panel company that goes broke in California in the summer.

I don’t want to say the solar panels are bad, but they absorb less sunlight than John Boehner.

Conan

Facebook has appointed a new director of privacy. His name is Dave Jenkins, he lives at 17 Oakwood Lane, and his PIN number is 3153.

Lady Gaga had a serious wardrobe malfunction at Fashion Week. She was caught in a blouse, skirt, and hat made of simple fabric.

NASCAR is trying some new initiatives to go green, including planting trees and using ethanol fuel. Most controversial is the idea of having NASCAR drivers carpool in the race.

Late Show with David Letterman

Rerun

Jimmy Kimmel Live

Snoop Dogg has signed on to star in a family sitcom. Remember when Snoop Dogg used to kill people?

There was meteor sighting across several states. I spent the whole morning in the desert looking for a baby Superman, but couldn’t find one.

The University of Chicago is hosting an academic conference called “Jersey Shore Studies.” Meanwhile in Korea, students are learning something called “math.”

Late Night with Jimmy Fallon

Last night in the Rose Garden, President Obama had a beer with a Medal of Honor winner. Not to be outdone, Joe Biden had a beer with a “World of Warcraft” winner.

This week, Michele Bachmann and Cindy McCain had dinner together at a Mexican restaurant in Arizona. It wasn’t good. First they sent their entree back to the kitchen, then they sent the kitchen staff back to Guadalajara.

On Tuesday, Michelle Obama honored the creator of the Verdana computer font for his life’s work. Yeah, she also honored the creator of Courier New for making my college essays look two to three pages longer.

 
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