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Wednesday Jan 26 2011

The Tonight Show with Jay Leno Banner

Last night, President Obama gave the State of the Union address. Vice President Biden called it a great speech. House Speaker John Boehner called it a real tearjerker.

President Obama said our country is facing another Sputnik moment, which is well over the heads of a lot of young people. They think Sputnik is Snooki's older sister.

Did you see the pictures of Snooki sitting next to Kim Kardashian at an NBA game over the weekend? It looked like Kim was staring at herself in a funhouse mirror.

A social networking revolution has started in Saudi Arabia. Over 10 million Saudis are now online. In fact, the most popular social networking site for women in Saudi Arabia: "Cover-Your-Facebook."

Conan

The theme of President Obama's State of the Union address was "Win the Future." It was much more inspiring than the original theme: Beat the rerun of "Top Chef."

Egypt is now in its second day of angry street protests, and Secretary of State Hillary Clinton is calling for calm. Nothing enrages an inflamed Arab country like a powerful woman ordering it around.

Yesterday Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg had his own Facebook fan page hacked into. Zuckerberg immediately ordered the hacker to be tracked down, seized, and hired.

It's been widely reported that the meat content of Taco Bell's ground beef is only 36 percent, which explains their new slogan: "Think Outside the Cow."

Late Show with David Letterman

Rerun

The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson

Not such a great day for Italy. MTV has announced the next season of “Jersey Shore” will take place in Italy.

Good for the cast, though. With all of their uncontrolled sex and parties, one of them could wind up being the next prime minister.

Today is the World Economic Forum in Switzerland. The world’s wealthiest get together and rub dollars on themselves.

I think the Swiss lull us into believing their neutrality, but behind our backs, they’re preparing their armies with their Swiss Army knives.

Jimmy Kimmel Live

President Obama gave the annual State of the Union address last night. I learn something new at these every year. Like, did you know that East Virginia isn't a state?

President Obama promised to veto any bill sent to his desk with earmarks. I think he's just being overly sensitive about his ears.

He also said we have to win the future. He said that seven different times I'd settle on tying the future. I don't like to get greedy.

Late Night with Jimmy Fallon

Rerun

 
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