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Tuesday Jul 06 2010

The Tonight Show with Jay Leno Banner

The East Coast is suffering from a terrible heat wave. Wall Street bankers are jumping out of windows just for the cool breeze on the way down.

Queen Elizabeth is visiting New York City for the first time since 1976. I understand she’s trying to help them recruit LeBron James.

Back in 1776, Americans were fighting to escape British rule, these days we’re fighting to escape British oil.

Iran has banned the mullet. Today, the state of Kentucky broke off all diplomatic relations with Iran.

Late Show with David Letterman

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The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson

Economists say that a college degree may not be necessary to succeed in life. I didn’t have a degree and here I am. Seriously, kids, go to college.

“As the World Turns” has been on for 54 years. Some of the cast members are really old. Although, on CBS, once you reach 95, you get to host “60 Minutes.”

They give out daytime Emmy nominations to all the daytime talk shows such as “Oprah” and . . . Well, that’s it.

Jimmy Kimmel Live

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Late Night with Jimmy Fallon

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