Thursday Jun 24 2010

The Tonight Show with Jay Leno Banner

Well, we all knew it was going to happen — Gen. McChrystal has canceled his subscription to Rolling Stone.

Scientists in Geneva say that by smashing subatomic particles together, they can come very close to replicating the Big Bang that created the universe. Well, what could go wrong there?

Mexico has filed a brief in a U.S. court to stop Arizona’s immigration law. And while they’re at it, they also asked the court to stop Taco Bell from calling itself “Mexican” food.

A Florida man was run over by his own truck after his dog put the truck in gear. First, it looked like an accident but it turns out the dog was texting.

Late Show with David Letterman

The iPhone 4 is thinner and more compact, which means it’s easier to lose in a cab.

It took three days to end a tennis match at Wimbledon. That’s just one more thing that Obama couldn’t stop.

Congressmen have been saying from the beginning that BP is either lying or grossly incompetent. Well, why can’t we have both?

President Obama is in a tough spot because he fired Gen. McChrystal and right away, the Republicans blamed him for increasing unemployment.

The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson

It’s a great day for former New York Gov. Eliot Spitzer. He’s getting his own talk show. They wanted him because they knew he could get the most out of an hour.

The new show will focus on politics and special events and everything else Spitzer wasn’t doing in office.

I used to be on the Drew Carey show. I was the fat one with the glasses.

Jimmy Kimmel Live

The iPhone 4 is $499 to buy outright, $199 to upgrade your existing iPhone, and if you don’t want one at all, it’s $99.

Let me see if I understand soccer. A yellow card is a warning, a red card means you have to leave the game, and a green card means you can move to the United States.

Between the three-day tennis match and the World Cup, we may be in the golden age of boredom.

Late Night with Jimmy Fallon

The Coast Guard found a drunk man on a pool float yesterday after he drifted a mile out into the Gulf of Mexico. Authorities called the guy “irresponsible,” while BP called him “our best hope.”

Queen Elizabeth made her first visit to Wimbledon in 33 years. She’s 84 years old. I guess that's why instead of grass, the courts are covered in non-slip bath mats.

The confirmation hearings for Supreme Court nominee Elena Kagan will be shown live Monday on C-SPAN 3. You know it's going to be boring when C-SPAN 2 passes on it.

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