Thursday Feb 25 2010

Late Show with David Letterman


The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson

It’s a bad day for General Motors. They’re shutting down the Hummer. The Chinese were going to buy it, but after careful consideration, the Chinese decided they don’t want it. You know you’re in pretty bad shape when you can’t even give away a Hummer.

It’s also not a good day for George Clooney. He’s having to sell his house in Italy because of the paparazzi. Boo hoo!

This week has been exciting in Washington, D.C. There’s been a consensus development conference on lactose intolerance. Take that, Vancouver.

Lactose intolerance means that you can’t digest milk, and drinking it can make you gassy. There’s another condition that causes this. It’s called, “being a guy.”

Jimmy Kimmel Live

President Obama hosted a bipartisan healthcare summit today. They met for a little more than six hours which, coincidentally, happens to be the average wait time at the emergency room, if you’re bleeding.

Obama and several others made the point that Congress uses taxpayer money to buy themselves excellent health insurance. It actually led to a plan to make everyone in the country a member of Congress, so congratulations, representatives.

The Olympics just had the women’s figure skating finale. The audience was primarily made up of women and perverts. I did not watch it.

The Olympics have been a mixed blessing for Canada. They were hoping to win more medals than any other country, but they are way behind. You would think that at this point, Canada would be very comfortable not being No. 1.

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