President Obama is taking a historic trip — He's in Russia. Obama went there because from Russia, you can actually see Sarah Palin cleaning out her office in Alaska.
Over the weekend, Sarah Palin shocked the country by resigning as governor of Alaska. Republicans aren’t sure who is going to fill her role in the party, but they are in talks with several of the “Real Housewives of New Jersey.”
In her resignation speech, Sarah Palin said she polled her children on whether she should resign and the count was unanimous. Ladies and gentlemen, even her children thought she was in over her head.
South Carolina Gov. Mark Sanford returned to work today after spending a holiday weekend in Florida with his wife and children. Or as Sanford called the weekend, “a total waste of time.”
I took my mother to see fireworks on the Fourth of July. Every time a big one went off, she screamed, "It's North Korea! It's North Korea!"
What's Kim Jong Il's deal? Over the weekend they launched seven missiles. Vice president Joe Biden said they're just trying to get attention. Well, that should calm things down.
President Obama is in Russia. He's discussing concessions from the Russians. They've agreed to produce fewer nuclear warheads and more hot tennis babes.
President Obama is in Russia. We know this because Sarah Palin says she can see him from her house.
The big news: Sarah Palin quitting as governor of Alaska. Everybody was shocked. Even John McCain was surprised. He was like, "Who?"
Palin hasn't made a decision this controversial since deciding whether to wear her hair up or down.
Don't worry, though. Alaska will be fine. According to the state's Constitution, the job automatically goes to the lieutenant governor — Chilly Willy.