Tuesday Aug 27 2013

The Tonight Show with Jay Leno Banner

The state attorney general of New York is suing Donald Trump for $40 million, claiming that Donald Trump University is not a real university. The state claims it's not a real college because students get very little education and were unable to find jobs after they graduated. Sounds like a real college to me.

I guess the attorney general got suspicious it wasn't a real college when Donald took the senior class on a field trip to try and find President Obama's birth certificate.

The treasury secretary has now asked Congress to raise the debt limit for borrowing more money as soon as possible. The secretary of the treasury said if Congress doesn't act soon, the government will have to work with only the money it has now. You know, like the rest of us do.

The owner of a grocery store who named a store after Alex Rodriguez now wants to change his store's public image. He's looking for a new name for the store. Why? Keep the same name. Just turn it into a drugstore.

Late Show with David Letterman

Miley Cyrus has been granted asylum in Russia. That's what I heard.

You see Miley Sunday night on the VMA thing, the MTV show? The White House is considering military intervention.

Every time you watch this show, it's worth eight credits at Dave Letterman University.

Donald Trump had a university. Well, the state attorney general decided that the Donald Trump University was an unlicensed sham. And I thought, you know you're at a bad university when your commencement speaker is Whitey Bulger.

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