In general, everybody would agree that it's good to be open and honest with your spouse. Honesty nurtures a good relationship that makes for a happy and healthy marriage. However, at times it is wiser to conceal from your spouse certain thoughts and deeds as long as they don't jeopardize the harmony of your marriage. In all likelihood, your wife will keep from you certain thoughts and facts including:
1. Money Secrets: Your wife hiding money is not a new concept. For centuries, wives have been doing it. The pockets of their husbands have been their rightful source of income. Being completely open means they have to explain every expense. Not everyone wants to do that. Some would rather not have to answer for their spending and would rather not be criticized. Some of them have a tendency to have a secret credit card, or a bank account of their own. But most wives feel it not necessary to inform their husband about money secrets because of the fear of being controlled.
2. Things you can't help: Your wife is likely to not state facts that might bug you. Maybe your spouse wanted her husband to be a wildlife photographer, or a fashion photographer, whereas you are an investment banker. It is something that she can’t help thinking, but expressing such thoughts would only make you feel insecure and resentful. So, she will most likely not voice these opinions, and you should not prod her to.
3. Life at work: If your wife is a working woman, she is bound to keep some secrets from you about her professional life. You can’t expect her to come and report to you every time she has to face the displeasure of her boss, or each time her co-worker asks her for coffee, or gave her an admiring glance. It is also true that she may not tell you about mistakes she makes at work. Not knowing about your wife’s professional life will save you both a lot of tension in your personal life.
4. Negative things about your relatives: She’ll probably never tell you when she is annoyed with your parents or your closest friend. Try to think rationally. It is not necessary that your loved ones are equally loved by her. Always keep an open mind about the shortcomings of your friends, or the insensitive behavior of your parents towards her. It is ideal to leave such things in the closet and never be engaged in a conversation that can disrupt the equilibrium of your otherwise peaceful marriage.
5. Good memories of her ex-fiancé: Everyone has a past, and perhaps, so does your wife. She has had a life of her own, long before she met you, and in that life there could be someone who was close to her. She may have even have had a past engagement. She will most likely never disclose or share this with you, because she cares about your feelings. Do not try to know all of your wife’s secrets or assume that she is cheating on you. She might be hiding some secrets out of concern for you. Let your wife’s secrets remain secrets.
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