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5 Myths about Divorce

Tuesday, 07 Dec 2010 05:07 PM

Divorce has become a harsh reality of modern times. It is a reality the face of which changes as we evolve socially, culturally, and racially. And these realities are surrounded by overpowering myths that refuse to subside with time. The top five myths about divorce are:
  1. Once bitten, twice better: It is generally believed that anyone who has had a bitter experience behind them will have a better marriage the second time around. But the statistics deny this; there is a study that proves that a larger number of second marriages tend to fail than the first ones.
  2. It’s better for the children: This is generally not true unless it is due to high volatility, abuse, and much emotional trauma involving the spouse and the children. Divorce puts children at a risk of higher levels of dysfunction in their interpersonal relationships and affects their emotional growth.
  3. Living together before marriage makes it last longer: This is not necessarily true. On the contrary, it has been observed that living together before marriage may lead to a faster divorce because it stems from the thought-process that views relationship as trial and error rather than a permanent decision that requires a life-long commitment.
  4. Standard of living plummets hugely for women: This is one of the major myths about divorce. It is a widely held belief that after divorce, the standard of living of women plummets to about 70% of what they had earlier, while the standard of living of men increases up to 30%. Though it is a fact that there is a decrease in women’s living standards and an increase in that of men, the statistics are entirely untrue. Actually, a woman’s lifestyle may take a beating of about 10% and a man’s might improve by 10. The difference is not as large as is believed.  
  5. Men are more likely to initiate: Men are believed to be more likely to ask for a divorce, whereas women are perceived as those who stick it out till the end, no matter what. Despite many divorce lawyers for men available on call in the United States, women are found to initiate the divorce proceeding more than men. This is also because divorce laws have made it easier for them to keep the custody of their children.

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